Tuesday, March 28, 2006

It's Raining Zen

Some of the best moments in my life have occurred at 2 in the morn, caked in mud, exhausted, sitting in the middle of a monsoon, and hungry enough not to care that my meatloaf MRE has become mystery meat soup.
You reach a quiet zen about yourself in moments like this. You can't whine about it, there's way to much to whine about. It's the difference between holding a handful of dirt and trying to hold the world in your hands. You can't explain how much it sucks to anyone because anyone not there would never be able to grasp the full suckiness of the situation and anyone there doesn't need for it to be explained.
Like dry ice, so cold it burns, the moment sucks so much it makes you happy. You don't care that your bills are overdue, your broke, your girlfriend left you for your best friend or that your dog died. In the infinite suckiness of the moment these worries seem distant. Instead you concentrate on not shivering long enough to put the spoonful of rain soaked meat in your mouth.
Many of you know I left the army about 4 yrs. ago. Rainy nights are now usually spent snuggled in bed under layers of blankets pondering just how "soft" I have become.
A few of you may know that for the last couple of weeks Hawaii has been hit by torrential rains. Enough to break a dam on one island and flood several area's of mine.
A couple of you may know that my job is to drive around all-night, repeatedly doing things that require me to leave the safety of my car and stand in the rain.
None of you know that I am sick.
This isn't a story about how I reached some zen like peace one night while standing in the rain. This is me whining. I'm cold, I'm wet, I'm hacking up a lung, I'm tired and I want to go home, crawl into my bed, possibly cuddle my wife and ponder just how "soft" I have become.

3 Comments:

Blogger Dustin Dwyer said...

Crybaby.

29 March, 2006  
Blogger Me said...

yes, you are now "soft."

01 April, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

eh they've never been in such rain & mud! They know not of what you write. Save yourself..move to Florida~ym

21 January, 2007  

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